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Children today
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Nimble Jack

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 22, 2006 11:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

Geddoe wrote,
Quote:

Speaking of parental responsibility, it Michael Bolton's me off that parents now are so hasty to disavow responsibility of their kids at the times they need it most.


I agree with you 100%.

I would say that a major factor affecting kids these days is technology. Technology is advancing at an unprecedented rate and things that I, as a 17 year-old, grew up with are not existent in the lives of children that are five, or ten years younger than I. For example, I grew up listening to cassette tapes, I don't think that the average 10 year old knows the differance between side 'A' and side 'B'. One reason kids grow up fast is becuase the world is changing faster than it ever has, and kids are keeping up with that.
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Eden

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 3:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

I believe it is a matter of society, because it is just the product of the change of sexual contents presented in the public.
There was a time when even adults who are married weren't allowed to see each other naked... today an ten year old could tell you the website for every fetish the human mind can come up with. I know about some written commercial for "the discrete things of the female body". I know this only, because an american writer has written about this. She was talking about the great mistery behind it. She didn't know for years what the commercial was for, because it only was a white background with a text "because (insert name of the company or product)" or similiar.

What I am trying to say is that those things have changed and therefore changed more than just the view of the adulthood, but also the children changed. One can argue if the technic allowed the society to change these manners (what I believe) or whether it was reverse in some things. Reality is that having internet and television was some kind of engine that differed the way people saw sexuality. Since this changed the whole society it is only natural that young girls who only grow breasts suddenly wear shirts and tops with crude writings (very polemik, I know). Anyway, I am not trying to say that this is good...
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Goldy

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 3:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

Well it is down to the parents of course! If the childrens parents set the right example the kids will grow up fine.

And yes i have seen kids like this....i just look at how the parents are raising them. The kids are spoilt and get away with everything and if they dont get want they want, throw a little tantrum until they do!

Blame the parents........
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Ninjar

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 4:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

My take on this is to blame God. Well, actually, the first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.

Anyway, onto something constructive. The reason that people dress like this is because for some reason, it is becoming more and more acceptable. Therefore, people don't always see it as wrong. That or the parents are worthless and are afraid of telling their children that they are in charge.
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Eden

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 4:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

I don't think we can blame the parents as a whole demographic group. Most parents try to raise their children the best way they can think of. I have made the experience that young girls at a school party which a few friends of mine had to initiate as some kind of "older-younger-pupil-project" went to friends normally dressed, changed their clothes to miniskirts and stuff.

I really don't want to see such young girls wear and danced like professional Gogo-dancers... and those girls were only 13. As the party ended (ten o'clock, because it went dark already) they changed their clothes again and looked rather normal when the parents came. How are the parents supposed to control such behavior? Do not let the kids party under the control of 18 year old? Do not let them go to friends earlier? Children will do everything they can to live the life they see at television or any children magazine...
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kuwaizair

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 30, 2006 7:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

So as long as the girls can be responsible its ok to dress like that?

nowadays young teens have kissing parties and co-ed sleep overs, they play games like "15 minnutes in heaven" (is that when you spend 15 min with somone in a closet? its like a new, more extream version of 'spin the bottle')

Kids date young now. Kids as young as 8 join gangs. some kids are criminals even at 10 (I was friends with a boy who had stolen a few cars at 13)

so, whats with the whippersnapers?
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Schala-Kid

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 31, 2006 4:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

kuwaizair, please remember, you are still talking about a minority of 'children'.

as to why?
people have blamed tv. society. lawyers. corperations. celebrities. change in freedoms. advancing technology. but one thing is ever present in this and thats Absent, or just bad, parents. If you have a problem with the clothes these kids wear, who is putting it on them? Who is paying for it?

We've given you reasons we might believe are the reason why SOME kids appear to be out of control. Now what? we can keep going on and on with this discussion, or you can just acknowledge that your question was answered Ku and steer this topic in a new direction, before it gets closed for going nowhere fast.
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Kikito

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 31, 2006 9:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

I know there were reasons posted as to why kids(or at least some of them) might want to act a certain way(like bad parenting, technology among others) but I'm concerned with something other than this.

What I'd like to know is at what point is a kid's actions the responsability of their parents, and when are their actions their own responsability. In fact, I'd even like to know even when the government itself should take responsability. Isn't it a governent's duty to make laws(as well and enforce them) that govern the wellfare of it's citizens? You see, if the "bad apple kids" is a really important problem in society today, then I think we can all agree that the government should take some responsability for the wellfare of it's people.

I know for a fact that parenting has lot to do with how a child turns out. However(and this is a big however) this is definitely not the only factor. I was raised pretty much just like my four younger brothers. However, we each turned out very different. WHile I may be the good kid of the family(sort of) some of my brothers have the sort of discipline problems that if unchecked could lead to worse things in the future. At which point is this my parent's responsability? I'm pretty sure any 13 year old kid could find a way to act like they shouldn't without their parents knowing. However, how could this be the parent's fault when they don't even know what their kid is doing. I think that sometimes the blame is cast to the parents, when it may not necessarily be their fault. Kids are exposed to way too many things that it could just be too complicated to find a single reason as to why this kid turned out well and the other oturns out to be some kind of criminal.

Summing things up, I think that blame doesn't always fall on the parents, and that kids have a choice. Some will fall of the good path, while some will stay on it. It's all a matter of the individual circumstances surrounding each case.
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Schala-Kid

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 01, 2006 12:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

Quote:
I'm pretty sure any 13 year old kid could find a way to act like they shouldn't without their parents knowing. However, how could this be the parent's fault when they don't even know what their kid is doing. I think that sometimes the blame is cast to the parents, when it may not necessarily be their fault.


Well, parents don't just raise kids to be teenagers. They raise them to be good adults. The teenage years are difficult, and parents can easily loose touch with their children. In fact, this society probably encourages it. The family unit has generally shifted, with most families now requiring both parents to work. Divorce rates are up, Single parents are up. This places a lot of stress on the adults involved, and they probably don't have the time to keep up with their children. But as parents, they should.

Governments are not here to raise children. Passing laws prohibiting the manufacturing of items that overall, parents and groups in society deem as contributing to children "being out of control" is removing freedom from choice from you as a consumer and the younger generation. They will grow up with the knowledge that the government knows what is best for them and will restrict access to items they think is harmful for them. They learn to not question their government as their liberties are erroded. Why on earth would we persue laws that prohibit the manufacturing of what we see as "innapropriate" things, when it falls on the parents who are the gatekeepers in the purchasing decisions. parents are the gatekeepers of internet usage. parents are the gatekeepers of TV usage. You don't go and get your government to do your job for you.
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Eden

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 4:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

Schala-Kid wrote:
In fact, this society probably encourages it.


Of course society encourages loosing up the strong bond between parents and children when they reach a certain point, namely adoloscents or "teenage-years" or puberty, it's all the same. Human children are rather helpless for a more or less time if you compare it to other animals. Since the grown up needs to be a strong individuum in order to strengthen the whole community, there has to be a time when this growing-up have to become imminent. Naturally this course of action is terrible for most adolescents and their parents.
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Kikito

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 04, 2006 3:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

Schala-Kid wrote:

Well, parents don't just raise kids to be teenagers. They raise them to be good adults. The teenage years are difficult, and parents can easily loose touch with their children. In fact, this society probably encourages it. The family unit has generally shifted, with most families now requiring both parents to work. Divorce rates are up, Single parents are up. This places a lot of stress on the adults involved, and they probably don't have the time to keep up with their children. But as parents, they should.

Governments are not here to raise children. Passing laws prohibiting the manufacturing of items that overall, parents and groups in society deem as contributing to children "being out of control" is removing freedom from choice from you as a consumer and the younger generation. They will grow up with the knowledge that the government knows what is best for them and will restrict access to items they think is harmful for them. They learn to not question their government as their liberties are erroded. Why on earth would we persue laws that prohibit the manufacturing of what we see as "innapropriate" things, when it falls on the parents who are the gatekeepers in the purchasing decisions. parents are the gatekeepers of internet usage. parents are the gatekeepers of TV usage. You don't go and get your government to do your job for you.



Yeah, I sort of forgot about that with parents. After giving it some thought I guess you are right. Parents are raising children(as well as teenagers) to be adults after all.

However, I think I may have chosen the wrong wording when I refered to the govenment's responsability. I didn't mean that they should control what sort of products/services etc. are consiidered harmful to those whp are underage. What I actually tried to say is that the government(or at least the one here, I can't really speak for other countries) is very lax when enforcing some of it's laws concerning children. For example, it's not common to find 14, 15, or 16 year olds drinking in parties, or even to see some(or a lot) in the local pub drinking and smoking. I've seen this kind of behaviour and it really seems like the government should either be more strict on it's underage drinking laws by preassuring establishments with stricter laws, or something like this, because to the owners customers are just customers. They don't care who's buing their alcohol, as long ias it's getting bought. In my opinion the government should make laws that make them care with heftier fines or some other kind of punishment.
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Eden

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 5:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

I can't fully agree that parents are important for the teenager's education. Of course parents are the most important persons a young child can have and they will learn whatever the parents are prepared to teach them (with some difficulties of course), but then, and that may change in different nations and societies, the kindergarden takes over and rather unrelated people teach the child. How many children can read and do the maths before they went to the kindergarden?

I was able to, but as far as I remember not many of the others. That is just an example and can be very different in general of course. Anyway, later the school takes over and finally the friendships are more important to teenagers than parents. That is just how things work. Although I don't pretend that parents aren't responsible for their children's education, I don't think they are as important today as it was in times when one parent was always at home.

I agree, anyhow, with you Kikito. There should be laws... but I don't know what kind of.
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Tokuro

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 12:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Add User to Ignore List

What about put the blame for once on the kids itself? But you are going to say "they are not smart enough to know what they are doing". Wrong! One can try to fool yourself by saying this or even fool other, but inside they know they are wrong. And there is no need to have anything wrong with his family or anythning. Want an example? I'll give you mine. When I had seven years old, I was one of the most hated on the school. Why? Because I hang out with the populars, making fun and hurting the others. By that time I already had the conscience that most of what I was doing was wrong, but nevertheless I continued. My parents never knew nothing, when something gone wrong I lied, and they trusted me. I did lots of stupid things, just because the other wanted me to do it. Til one day I got sick of this and just left, and know what? It was hard. I lost my floor and "friends", did not belonged to a group no more. But I survived, and today I have a great life, one of discipline and not hipocrisy. So blame whatever you want to blame, but the fault is that lacks the courage to people stand to what they think is right and agains what they think is wrong, and that is why they do what they do. They just fear that they will lose their friends if they are not dressed like the majority tells them to wear, instead of just wear what they want.
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